The very fact that the other woman came in to the pub and acted unreasonably (if not out right rude), particularly fi there were other members of the public there, you can bar her form comming in to the pub again. Speak to the Manager and Landlord, and he will make the arragements. The fact that other people have warned you should send flashing lights at you that the relaitionship will be unreliable.
Surely, even if he was asleep, if you chucked the phone at him he would have woken up immediately- certainly I would; whether it hit me or not, I would jump out of my skin. As for the texts, are these all in-bound texts, or has he responded, indeed intitated any of them?
If so, I think if many of the other customers have warned about you about he inability to to hold a relationship down, or jump from one to another, I think I would drop him. And yes, definately have him barred from the pub.
You said that he has two teenage children, are they under the jurisdiction of the mother? Have you ever met the children and how do they react both to him and you?
The age diifference is collosal, and as you have only been going out with him for a year the break up now is not going to be as difficult than 3 years down the line.
If tantrrums like this are going on like this only a year in to the relationship, I think it is time to walk away as this will never be a stable relationship.
You don't trust him, you are constantly worried about whether he has feelings for the ex wife- he has kids with her and there will always be a connection.
I can't help feeling that this relationship is always going to cause you pain.You are still so young but he has lived a lifetime and collected oodles of baggage on the way!
He sounds to me that he's a player.I was deeply involved with one for years.They are well versed in telling you what you want to hear but your 6th sense tells you that it's bullsh*t just to keep you sweet.
I wish you would let go of this relationship before it drags you down even further, because you deserve to be happy and I can't help feeling that there's someone else out there who would treat you much better.