[#1]

I posted a similar thing a few weeks ago but it never got a reply. I dont know if maybe it looked too complicated to read? So I've made it a bit easier.

I want to split up with my boyfriend but i have no idea how to do it. He loves me so much more than i could ever love him back and i know its going to break his heart. I also love his best friend but neither of them know. but the only way i get to see his friend is through him so if i break up with my boyfriend i wont get to see his friend ever again. It's depressing me so much i just find myself bursting into tears at random occasions. I know the right thing to do is to break up with him. But how do i do it? what do i tell say? please help!!!

[#2]

I posted a similar thing a few weeks ago but it never got a reply. I dont know if maybe it looked too complicated to read? So I've made it a bit easier.

I want to split up with my boyfriend but i have no idea how to do it. He loves me so much more than i could ever love him back and i know its going to break his heart. I also love his best friend but neither of them know. but the only way i get to see his friend is through him so if i break up with my boyfriend i wont get to see his friend ever again. It's depressing me so much i just find myself bursting into tears at random occasions. I know the right thing to do is to break up with him. But how do i do it? what do i tell say? please help!!!

[#3]

Hi Emzy,

I don't have any advice really I'm afraid but I have been where you are so understand how you feel. You don't give any reasons for wanting to break up with your boyfriend...is there just no chemistry there for you? or is it just because you have developed an attachment to his friend?

It is very difficult to handle a situation like this, I broke up with my ex over a year ago due to various issues but had developed strong feelings for one of his friends in the meantime and found that I was spending more time with my boyfriend just to see his friend. A few months after this his friend got back in contact with me and we have been seeing eachother (not in a dating way) at least once a week for the past few months. My ex does not know this as it would hurt/anger him as he didn't want me to have any contact with anyone he knew once we broke up.

How close are you to his friend?  It would not be a good idea to break up with your boyfriend and go out with his friend as this will cause nothing but pain for your ex and could damage their friendship, disrupting the peace in the social group they have.

GF X

[#4]

Thank you for replying. The main reason for breaking up with him is the simple fact that i dont love him anymore. sure i care for him a great deal but im not in love. He is a really sensitive guy though so i dont know what i could say to limit the amount of hurt he would feel. I really dont know what to say to him. How should i do it? I want to do it tomorrow. As soon as possible really because i dont want to carry on leading him into something that isnt there anymore. As much as i love his friend i know it wouldnt really work between us purely because of how close they both are. So i'll have to live with that.
emzy x 

[#5]

How long have you been with him for? Are you living together?

I can't really give much advice on what to actually say or how to put it but make sure you do it in person, ask to meet him for a drink or something. And make sure that beforehand you have worked out exactly the reasons why you are no longer in love with him, whether it is something that he has done or if you have changed somehow and want different things from life.  He will most likely want specific examples and so it is best if you are ready for that. The most important thing is to do it gently though, if he is as sensitive as you say he may become slightly emotional so be ready for that to but don't back down.

Let us know how it goes, and best of luck

GF X

[#6]

I've been with him for almost a year. it would be a year at the end of April so it's been quite a while but we're not living together. 
I've been talking to one of his friends (not close friends luckily) and we've been hitting it off with eachother pretty well. whether there is actual chemistry there or if its just the excitment of meeting someone new i dont know. but we've been on about meeting up with eachother for a drink one day. 
Well anyway i split up with the boyfriend today and he's absolutly determined to make another go of it. for me to give him a second chance. I will be willing to do that but then on the other hand where does that leave the other guy?
Im so confused! 

[#7]

If you are serious about breaking up with your boyfriend then you should have made it clear that there would be no second chance as he will only hold on to that hope and keep on pursuing you. If you really want to break up with him then why are you willing to give it another go if you don't love him? You can't make yourself love someone just to keep them happy.

On the other hand, if you do want to make it work then you need to completely forget about this other guy and focus on making your relationship work. I think you need need some time away from both men, stop contact with both of them for a few days, a week etc so that you can think about where your heart lies and what you truely want as you are sounding a bit confused at the moment. In any case I really would not advise jumping into a relationship with another bloke straight after splitting up with bf as it most likely would be a rebound reaction, something new and exciting (but ultimately unfulfilling) and would hurt your ex when he found out about it.

You need some space to think.

GF X