[#1]

I realise I'm probably being unreasonable or it's just hitting me how different from my friends I am or it's a bit of how the other half live or something but I can't get over the stuff that happens around weddings at the minute. Obviously I can't talk about it on facebook or anywhere else like that! My friends know my views on weddings but everything just seems so extreme.

Friends of ours are getting married in the summer, the bride has already had 2 hen weekends. The groom has had his first one. They're having multiple wedding receptions and 2 honeymoons - one to "recover from the wedding" and the other "proper" one. WTF is that about? And then they have the brass neck nerve to request no gifts just cash! WTF?

I could go on all day just about this one obscene display of excess but there's so much more...

And I don't give a toss about chair covers 

eta yes I know people can do what they want with their money, it's just something I don't get, the huge amounts of cash and resources spend just gets to me.

[#2]

I realise I'm probably being unreasonable or it's just hitting me how different from my friends I am or it's a bit of how the other half live or something but I can't get over the stuff that happens around weddings at the minute. Obviously I can't talk about it on facebook or anywhere else like that! My friends know my views on weddings but everything just seems so extreme.

Friends of ours are getting married in the summer, the bride has already had 2 hen weekends. The groom has had his first one. They're having multiple wedding receptions and 2 honeymoons - one to "recover from the wedding" and the other "proper" one. WTF is that about? And then they have the brass neck nerve to request no gifts just cash! WTF?

I could go on all day just about this one obscene display of excess but there's so much more...

And I don't give a toss about chair covers 

eta yes I know people can do what they want with their money, it's just something I don't get, the huge amounts of cash and resources spend just gets to me.

[#3]

I tend to feel that the 'fluff' around many weddings these days makes people lose sight of what getting married is all about. To me it is about love and commitment to someone not about hen nights, thousands spent on the trapping , etc.  It is a very special day in our lives and it is nice to make it special but not lavish.

I had two ceremonies when I married OH ( because we are two very separate religions) but only one reception, no hen/stag nights. We had a friend visit us recently and he showed us his wedding photos. The ceremony was lovely, the reception looked so nice and they did everything themselves. The wedding cake was a plain one from M & S and they decorated the top with flowers, etc and it looked fantastic. They planned and did the work together which was also nice.

Each to his own I suppose. 

Hugs

Jillxx

[#4]

I agree with you on this. If we were to get married it would be fairly simple. I dont get why people have hen/stag do's that last 3 or 4 days or spend £1000's on an outfit. Don't get me wrong I'd want it to be special but I hate being centre of attention. What I'd like to do is get married on the quiet, so no hen do, then have a party afterwards somewhere nice.

[#5]

Yours and your friends weddings sound nice Jill. 

Sunshine, I know at least 10 people who were on a hen/stag do in the past week. None of them just for one night and only one of them in this country. DH was invited to one but didn't go, it's not his thing. 

Getting married on the quiet then having a party after sounds nice. Well, I would say that as we did get married on the quiet! If we were to have a ceremony now I would want to get married at the new wedding venue in Blackpool, just because it's a beautiful modern building. Having said what I said about chair covers I would bring my own chairs as I don't like the claret velevet ones they have. I'd replace them with some polyprop chairs. I'd have a ukulele band playing and we'd go to wherever we chose for the part on a heritage tram. 

But it will never happen as there would be fuss, I know there would and that's what puts me off!

[#6]

DP really doesn't want to get married so I know it's something I'll never have to think about. I was married once but that was in another lifetime!

I got invited to a hen weekend recently. It was one of my really good friends. I'm lucky in that she understands me and never questions or criticises me. I didn't want to go and that was good enough for her. Its not my thing. There was no bad feeling. I don't think there are many like her. She's one for tagging herself and others on fb all the time so I said to her tag me with you and you'll know I'm there in spirit!

[#7]

Totally agree. When my DS remarried it was a simple basic church service, close family and special friends only. Bride's parents live in the middle of the countryside and farmer offered his field to set up a marquee for the reception. It was absolutely lovely and a very special day for the people involved.

The other thing about big weddings is that so many couples seem to think "sad, all over now" at the end of the celebrations, OTT honeymoon instead of looking forward to the challenges of their new life together.

hugs and muffins

Tabbs

"been there, done that , got the t-shirt!"

[#8]

That sounds like a lovely wedding Tabbs. Very appropriate if that's the word, a country wedding for a country person. 

I have never understood the idea of the wedding day being the best day of your life - what would be the point of getting married if it's all downhill from there? 

[#9]

It's all too much I agree. We married in registry office as its not about where but the commitments to your partner. A friend getting married un December is doing the full pomp bit and was shocked at our wedding and honeymoon only costing about 3000 still a lot of money x

[#10]

Woooaaahh! Way too OTT! And what a come down post wedding! It does sound like they've lost sight of what it is supposed to be about.

You know my views already hence our tiny wedding in September. I'm doing the cake myself. Found a gluten free cake pre-iced and then me and mum will decorate it with pre-made flowers and butterflies! Our extravagence is all about gathering family together and our marriage not about the show and tell of how much thbis cost or how drunk we got on a hen/stag! X

[#11]

Where did you find the GF iced cake?

It's really weird as they think they're having quite a smallish do! I think it's because they have reasons for everything they're doing they don't realise how huge it is for someone that doesn't know their thought patterns about it iyswim. It is just amazing to me. There are certain bits I'm leaving out as it would identify them and then I'd be in trouble!