topic Re: Coping with 2....... in General Discussion

Coping with 2.......

wanna-b-a-mum28 — Thu, 29 Sep 2011 10:15:20 GMT

Hi all,

Was just wondering how you cope with 1 toddler and a new born baby , I was thinking about it last night and I was thinking that they will have diffrent sleeping, diffrent eating patterns etc........How do you cope with night feeds, then getting up as normal with your toddler like he expects you too.

DP will have 3 weeks off work so will help out loads in those 3 weeks, but then ill be on my own, i was never on my own with DS as DP was unemployed so we both did it, and I had bad PND. Am just anxious will i be able to do it ????

I also want to breast feed, will DS get jealous etc..... ??? think hes having something diffrent etc...all these questions ???

Also i play on the floor a lot with DS and roll around on the floor with him, im not going to be able to soon. i dont want him missing out :-( i feel quite anxious and confused by it all xx

Re: Coping with 2.......

lilo83 — Thu, 29 Sep 2011 12:31:47 GMT

Hi hun,

I would love an insight into this too!! Although our gap will be a bit bigger but my little one is a young 2 iykwim. Dont know how im gonna get out of the house!! :)

Re: Coping with 2.......

lizcakey — Thu, 29 Sep 2011 13:00:42 GMT

You will be fine!! There is 2 yrs and 2 months between my boys, and i also worried during the pregnancy about coping with 2-its only natural i think! What i did find was that things just seemed to settle into place and work out in the end! You figure out different ways of doing things and stick with the way you find easiest for you, bit of trial and error, but it really does just all come together!

Hoping someone can give me some tips on how to get 2 older ones ready and off to school with a newborn!! Im nervous about that!!

Re: Coping with 2.......

angelwings1972 — Thu, 29 Sep 2011 14:15:49 GMT

Hope you dont mind me jumping in on the conversation.

With all my babies (6 with 7th on the way) I have found that they slot in the routine for school/nursery/home life really easily. Just go with the flow and try not to get too worked up about things. Take each day as it comes and dont be affraid to ask for help off friends and family.

Regarding breastfeeding and a toddler I used to sit and feed the baby and have time with my toddler by reading books to them at the same time. Try having a little activity bag that you can swap things around with on a weekly basis or if need be every few days so your toddler doesnt get too bored and it gives them some attention at the same time as you are bonding with your newborn.

Hope that has been of some help to you

Karen

Re: Coping with 2.......

sagiwinks84 — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 09:23:22 GMT

Yup, I agree with the others - with my 2, even with PND I somehow 'slotted' things together so to speak! def get some support if you need it, I found I did isolate myself a bit with PND so going to groups etc can be great to help you feel assured that there are lots of mummies doing the slotting together thing, and you will find routines through trial & error that will work for you & the kiddies!

Liz - I'm super nervous about my two & a newborn & the school run too, but I'm hoping I'll find a way round it. My DS starts school Sept 2012 so that's going to be interesting! lol

Robyn xxxx

(8+6)

Re: Coping with 2.......

zozza00 — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 09:41:58 GMT

ahhh hun, completely understand your anxieties...but you know what you will cope...... crazy at it seems i felt exactly the same DS 1 was 2yrs 8 months when DS 2 was born...... i worried how i would cope with night feeds, day time, ds1 routine and going back to work when ds2 was 3 months old....... i was alone the whole time as their dad was useless.......

and as a mumsy your natural mother nature instincts kick in and before you know it you will have a fabby routine in place and will wonder what you worried about :)

I think 2nd bubsy is easier than the first anyhow :) x x x I also think any child will get a lil envious as they have to go from having lots of mummys attention to having to share it......

my lil me play up at the mo and im sure its because of my expanding beanie baby! lol

Get your lil man involved.....look at books together and tell him hebeing a big brother and reading to his baby.... im going to let my lil men be as much involved as they want to be.....they even big enough to feed bubsy when he/she born.....

plus with this being df and i first bubsy together i feel like its first pregnancy all over again.

you will be fne and you ill work out what works best for you :) x x x

Re: Coping with 2.......

zozza00 — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 09:45:15 GMT

hehe again liz....like you say it will fall into place....my youngest son will be prepping to go to school next sept...... about 5 months after bubsy born....... i just think these things work out...we prob be up hours earlier than what we currently are and i always prep the night before...school clothes...so will just be a case of prepping baby bag and feeds as an additional.....

we are all SUPERMUMS you know :) truthfully mums are AMAZING and i dont think we ever give ourselves enough credit :) x x

Re: Coping with 2.......

zozza00 — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 09:48:07 GMT

Yay! Karen can i just say i admire you 6 lil people and another on the way....between df and i we have 5 children, me 2 and df 3 from previous relationship (so we never have them all at the same time 24/7) this is our first together but i would love a big family :)

so reading posts from fabby mums like yourself and sammyj really inspires me :) x x I will be a childminder by time lil beanie is born too, so lots of kidlings in my home...love it! lol x x x

Re: Coping with 2.......

sparkling-sunshine — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 12:30:08 GMT

I've got five and DS2 was 1 year and 6 days when DS3 came along. As the others have said you'll find the baby will just slot in. :smileyhappy:

As for the school routine I think the key is to be organised. I make sure everything is ready the night before so all we have to do in the morning is have breakfast, get dressed and then we're out the door. :smileyhappy:

Another thing is not to put too much pressure on yourself. If your toddler is grunpy and wanting soemthing to eat at the same time the baby needs feeding then give the toddler a banana or soemthing you can just grab which will bide you a bit of time to feed the baby.

I had the odd time when DS2 and DS3 were both awake in the night crying but you just deal with it. We've never had any major dramas even though DS3 is a terrible sleeper. You'll find your toddler will be so thrilled with a little brother or sister they can be a great help doing things like passing you a nappy when you need one.

Re: Coping with 2.......

sammyjp — Sat, 01 Oct 2011 09:52:37 GMT

It will work out hun!! My closest age gap is 18 months and this age gap will be nearly 2.5 years. As for the school run, don't put yourself under pressure to get babies dressed - a coat or cardi over their babygrow is fine. Just concentrate on getting those that need to be feed and watered sorted! Have everything ready, bowls for breakfast, clothes etc so that if baby needs a feed then school going kids can sort themselves as much as possible.

As for sleep, well you just adjust to less sleep! It is tiring but so very very rewarding and reminding yourself that the sleep deprivation won't last forever is good!

As for breastfeeding have a bfing basket. Put into that basket a few snacks and books for you toddler. Have the tv remote handy with stuff they like recorded. I used to find that sometimes the toddler would curl up and sleep next to me during those feeding sessions!

It does all fit in! I've survived 5 so far!! x

Re: Coping with 2.......

babykins — Tue, 04 Oct 2011 09:14:16 GMT

I have a school age DS too Liz...so bit nervous about that!! x